Takin' It To The Hill

  If you could give the year 2007 a theme, what would it be? Better yet, if you could match the year with a color, what would that color be? It's not often that you can cover two bases with just one answer. Green was the thing this past year with incarnations such as the the ever stylish Anya Hindmarch's "I'm Not a Plastic Bag" bag to Al Gore scoring the Nobel Prize for driving a hybrid Lexus. Green was so it that the term "greenwashing" was reared as a term to coin for environmental posers who seem to be more in the mindset of spending green to say they're green than actually doing anything to be green. As cynical as the examination of the environmental movement can be it goes without saying that at least it's happening at all. Better for green to be trendy than spilling oil or clubbing baby seals or something like that. Hopefully the trend will continue to the new year as the environment stays on the forefront of the American political landscape. Whomever Iowa and New Hampshire decide to allow to fill my mailbox and invade my tv with endless ads until November will certainly beat the environmental drum and it will be interesting to see how it all shakes out. I just hope the flyers that will soon adorn my front door knob will be printed on recycled paper.

Making the world a cleaner place will take more than Oprah wearing your name in 08 buttons. One politico that is doing the right thing by setting the example is Trek-owner Congressman Earl Blumenauer of (where else?) Portland, OR. His bike of choice? The Trek Portland. The congressman was featured this week in the Wall Street Journal for his dedication to all things two-wheeled. The only congressional office not to apply for a parking permit, Mr. Bluemenauer gets to work as many of his constituents do and doesn't seem to mind the dreadful Washington weather. You gotta respect a man that rolls up at the White House with a messenger bag and tracks down Newt Gingrich in the House gym to lobby for transit-fare subsidies for House workers. The craziest part of the whole article was the bit about Gingrich in the gym. Who knew that Newt like to hit the iron?

The Sweetest Game Ever

So I'm at Target this week purusing the video game aisle for some Christmas ideas for the youngest member of the fam. This was my first trip to purchase a video game in maybe 13 years and I have to say, I was a little taken aback. It's not that I haven't played video games since then, I lived in an apartment in college where all disputes were settled over a best-of-three round of Mario Kart. I just hadn't had to go and physically purchase one in a while. Have you seen video games lately? They're insane. I'm not going to judge the merits of someone who creates a game where points for armed robbery are awarded depending upon the level of violence somebody uses, but c'mon. Zapping aliens is one thing but leveling somebody with a spiked bat for their pocket change just seems a little wrong even if all the person really did was crush a few pixels. I'm sitting on my high horse about to jump down onto a soapbox (these metaphors of preachy arrogance doing anything for you?) when I started to reminisce about the games I played as a kid. I saved up for a full year for the $99.99 it cost to buy the (still the greatest of all time) Nintendo Entertainment System in 1988 and remember how stoked I was when the rents came through with Tecmo Bowl, Blades of Steel, and Paperboy that Christmas.

Paperboy is the greatest bicycle-related game of all time. Try to name another one. You can't. Aside from playing as Lawrence Taylor and being able to cover the ENTIRE field in Tecmo Bowl, it really didn't get any better than getting double points for delivering more than one paper into a single mailbox. I had a paper route as a kid and I think two papers at one address was always frowned on. Kind of a disparity between the game and real life I guess. One gripe I do have about the game was that break dancers were supposed to be your enemies. For the most part, I always believed break dancers to be friendly people (except when you get served) who would enjoy receiving a newspaper. When questioned, my Dad told me that they probably didn't subscribe to the newspaper and that's why they were obstacles in the game. I think that was my Dad's way of teaching me that nothing in life comes free. I don't remember any random break dancing going on during my paper route but I guess if I did, I would have tried to avoid it. Kind of takes away from the task at hand of delivering papers. I think that was Nintendo's way of teaching kids to stay on task. Thank you, Nintendo.

A Christmas Story

The first thing I usually do after arriving at HQ in the mornings is to check the Google Media report for any mentions that Trek may have received in the worldwide news. It's typically a ritual of sifting through various police reports bearing mentions of somebody's Trek was stolen somewhere and that local authorities appreciate any information leading to its safe return knowing full well that maybe 1% of all stolen bikes are returned to their original owner. It's not that Trek doesn't care about its products being stolen, there's just not much we can do about it besides make a decent lock and encourage people to use it. That, coupled with the fact that stolen bikes are close to number 9,000 on a police department's already crowded priority list, it's no wonder that thousands of bikes year-round just evaporate into the ether. 

Today was different though. I turned on "the Google" and began to scroll through various articles regarding people's Treks as verbs instead of nouns and came across another sentence that read "...stolen his Trek bicycle..." and was just about to dismiss it as another of man's continuous wrongs against fellow being and then stopped. The sentences following featured words like "community", "outcry", and "banded together". Well, that kind of lead would at least warrant a few minutes of investigation so for the first time in a year or so, I clicked on a story about a stolen Trek.

Apparently, a boy from Salem, OR had his Trek 820 stolen from his family's garage. A tragedy as the young man had earned his bike through his school's reading program. After the story was reported there was an uproar among Salemites and donations from across the town poured into the boy's school and our local dealer, Scott's Cycle and Fitness. In fact, the town not only raised enough money to replace the bicycle but a fund has now been started to ensure that other children will be able to receive bikes as a reward for their reading. 

At this time of year, stories of charitable pursuit are not uncommon. There's something about the season that begs our attention to those who are in need. While I'm sure my next post will question why this is the only time of year that the music from the Peanuts cartoons sounds appropriate, I wanted to take the time to recognize the efforts of the people of Salem and say how deeply touching it is that they would take the time to recognize the importance of replacing something that might seem as trivial as a stolen bicycle.

There IS Such a Thing as a Bad Idea

There's a lot of things that go on here at HQ that will most likely never see the flourescent lights of a bike shop. It's not that all of these products are a bad idea, it's just that the execution isn't there or its mere existence would offend the sensibilities of the market. Whether it be a product, a piece of aparrel, or just our archivist's cookies there are things created here that basically shouldn't be offered for consumption by, well, anyone. From time to time I will be exposing some of these products as they come, or roll, by my desk in an attempt to give you an inside look at some of the those ideas that should never have made it off of the whiteboard. 

If you will recall, Trek undertook a large-scale Critical Mass-style bike ride with 1,000 of our dealers aboard Trek Limes. If only we had this Lime tandem that our proto-lab guys whipped up, we could have saved ourselves 500 bikes.  Now, a Lime tandem is not necessarily a bad idea as the bike would bring the fun of cruising with auto shift to happy couples across the world. However, i feel that the fact that the bike cannot be manually shifted would probably end more relationships than it would enhance.

As you may have heard, Trek just jumped back into the pro cycling game after our Yankee's-of-the-late-90's style domination run of the pro ranks with the Discovery Channel team came to an end as the managing group of the team turned out the lights and locked the doors. We're now rolling 25 deep Kazach style with Team Astana. Signed to the team is Cali-reppen' US cycling stud Levi Leipheimer.  Levi's the current US Pro champ thus winning the right to wear lycra with a stars and stripes theme. If you win the US Championship, you should get some say so in what you get to rock and Levi is no jive turkey so it's no surprise that our designer chose not to present this jersey design to him. The design was so impactful it caused our marketing director to sing out "Sky rockets in flight!" (a line from the famous "Afternoon Delight" by the Starland Vocal Band). Guess that would be a "no".

Sometimes the stuff that gets the fish eye isn't even our fault. It's yours. We get product submissions all the time from our more creative consumers. I don't want to discourage innovation here but some of the stuff is pretty wild.  Like the rear-view mirror glove. Good idea for cars. Not so good for cycling gloves. The car mirror doesn't detract from the road and is stationary but glancing down at your hand takes your eyes off the road while your hand may move into several different positions thus making the reflection a great view of your shirt thus negating all of its safety features. Keep the innovation coming though guys!

The Inside Snowball

Y'know that old sitcom situation where the kid puts a snowball in the freezer to save it for the summer? That actually works. It snowed big today at HQ and let's just say, i stocked up. I had to clear some of the leftover roast beast and Who Hash out of the ice box but I made enough room for some serious mischief. Some people around here rock Nerf weaponry but vengence truly is a dish best served cold.

yeah, come June somebody's gonna get it.

What do you do when you're a sales rep that sells bicycles to a region that has been advised to stay indoors? Apparently, you go outside.

Tip of the Day: Wrap your snowball in tin foil before you put it in the freezer.

The Worst Gift Ever?

Like countless other offices across the country at this time of year, Trek is subjected to the good-natured underhandedness that is the spirit of Secret Santa. Some Santa's relish in their role as a winter gift-bearing fairy and, unfortunately, others freeze up like the late blooms of Wisconsin fall excusing themselves from their obligations with the I've-got-so-much-going-on-during-the-holiday-seasonisms. The victims of poor Secret Santa form? The unknowing and ungetting targets of this behavior whose only true crime was that their name was plucked from the hat at just the wrong time. It's amazing how much Secret Santa mimics real life in that respect. Many have Secret Santa confused with Black Christmas.  Secret Santa is a tradition of joyful sneakiness and fun (if not off-beat) gifts of treats and trinkets.  Black Christmas is a scar upon the face of the season where the object is only to find the worst possible gift that $5-$10 can buy. Albeit no less fun, the two should never be confused and people engaging in such activities should know exactly what they're signing up for.

Last week I returned from lunch to find my first gift of the season. Imagine my excitement when i saw the top of a green glass bottle, it's gold cap glinting in the overhead flourescent light, it's indiscernible gold label beckoning passers-by to consume its contents. I rushed to my desk, for oh what microbrewed deliciousness had my formerly absent Santa brought me? I had to look again, there was no way I was seeing what was truly there. Was this some kind of sick joke? It didn't make any sense. Why, oh why, would my Santa, hailing from the great brew state, leave me a bottle of O'Douls? I fumbled for the answer and looked down upon my depressingly alcohol-free "gift" and noticed there was something else. A rubber replica of the mascot of my beloved Wisconsin Badgers? I turned the object over and read the words i'll never forget. "Mild Chedder" was all that was written on the back of the proud symbol of my alma mater. My Santa had given me O'Douls and a Bucky Badger made of cheese.

I realize that by writing this post I am subjecting myself to future mistreatment by my dark-hearted "gift" giver but I am submitting this for the greater good. This experience lead me to think about the worst gifts ever received. I decided (like all bloggers) to make a list of what I feel are 5 of the worst gifts possible. Feel free to chime in with your own as I could only come up with the top five:

5. Pink Bunny Suit

4. Thrift Store Underwear

3. Grocery Store Coupons

2. Flowbee

1. A Gun Rack

Fashionisto

I'm not going to lie to you. I have a clinical addiction to magazines. I'll read most of anything as long as it has nothing to do with hunting, fishing, or lowriders. Sorry,those things just don't appeal to me. I totally get why the first 50 pages of a mag are ads. I don't care that most guys and girls mags are basically the same issue rehashed 12 times a year. Cologne samples? Bring em'.  15 ways to a better you? I thought I was at the top of my game but I guess I could find 15 things to work on. My favorite parts are the guides on how to meet the opposite sex.  It's basically a guide on how to be a normally functioning human being. Seemingly if you bathe regularly, brush your teeth, and don't act like a raging lunatic there's a good chance that there's somebody out there for you but you have to be willing to leave Mom's basement long enough to have a conversation. 

Magazine Gift/Gear Guides are a must for the industry since sometimes it's our only chance to get into a mag with a higher circulation than just every bike shop in America. This month's Vogue just hit the desk and I have to say that I am totally stoked to see a piece on bike fashion. For all of you out of the loop, there's a huge trend going on that tips it's hat to the wild world of  bike messengers. Bike couriers tend to be bred from the alt set and typically rock a look all their own. Hey, you have to be a little nuts to fly through NYC during rush hour without a helmet on a bike with no brakes. Capri pants for dudes ("manpri's" or "knickers"), messenger bags (which led to the male tote bag i.e.man-purse or "murse"), and single-speed bicycles are all proginy of the hipster bike messenger.  The whole thing really jumped the shark with the intro of the cycling jean but when Vogue does a story on bike fashion it really makes you wonder. A question that comes to my mind is why anybody would want to buy Chanel Lambskin Gloves for their ride to work or the market but hey, I'm down with Vogue's efforts to get their audience interested in ditching their car for a little while. If it takes $700 gloves for you to hop on a bike, well then forget your credit score and rock em' with pride.

A lot of bikers are against these mainstream bike-culture adaptations acting as if the world just stumbled on their great little secret. The funny thing is these are the same peeps who whine about narrow bike lanes and bike unfriendly urban planning. More bikes = more influence. Look, if you're in the know, don't act like a snob when a newbie asks you what the derailleur is or get pissed because somebody mispronounces "Campagnalo". Just be stoked that they care at all. I may have been despondent about the cycling jean but the fact of the matter is that its mere existence means that more people are recognizing the resurgence of the bike. If you haven't been paying attention, that's a really good thing. Just because you're not the only kid on the block rocking a fixed gear bike doesn't make it less nuts that you would willingly choose a bike with no brakes. It just means that you're not alone.

Now, if you willingly choose to spend $13,000 on a chi chi Chanel bike, yes, then you are absolutely insane. But  I have to admit, the design is pretty fly. Those jewel encrusted bicycle clips are totally weak though.

Ride. Definitely Ride

The 10 or so of you that read the "To Ride or Rent" post will remember that a while back I was struggling over the decision whether or not to take my fiancee to see Rent (of which I already had tickets and had promised to take her) or hit up an out-of-the-blue mancation with a buddy. Well, fresh powder and waxed snowboards won over the combined 15 years of the Rent casts's jazz-tap experience and I headed west to Colorado. I told her I had an "ok time" but that's total bull because I had an awesome time. Ditching your future wife for beer and boards is totally cool. A couple of nights on the couch will never erase the memory of attempting that backside indie 360 off that sick drop. No, the concussion and cold 90 Shilling more than took care of that. Quick plug; Midwest Airlines is literally the only way to fly. If you're a fan of Southwest all I can say to you is that they don't fly from Wisco so I would have no idea what you're talking about. Consider this; do they have chocolate chip cookies? No. They don't. And you get two of them. And they had milk. 1%.

If anybody's got a tip on how to make sleeping on a couch seem like you're only doing doing it because you want to, I'd love to hear it. C'mon guys, don't act like you've never woken up with the zipper from the cushion tattoo'd into your face. I had a roommate once who didn't even own a bed, just a couch. It wasn't even his couch. I don't even think it was a futon or a hideaway. Chicks really didn't dig him though. Probably because he smelled like the couch. How do you bring home a girl to a couch?

iTrek

Apple (you may have heard of them, I think they make a phone or something) dropped by HQ this week to film a segment for their website on how we use their sweet gizmos to make our sweet widgets. A film crew and some Appleites hung out with our design and brand teams for a couple of days and were treated with some Madtown flavor as they sampled the local fare and took in the NFL Network-broadcasted Packer game. Apple's site hosts a little section called Apple Pro that features how companies use Mac products to create that which we bring to market. There is a previous story on our design team, a great story on how the guys who illustrate South Park do their thing, and loads more.

Look for the link to the full story in a future post as yours truly's steamy scene with Kira Knightly is sure to hit the cutting room floor. There's just some stuff that's too racy for the internet.