Brown County MTB - Hoosiers are cool!

Just what the heck is a Hoosier?  Try Wikipedia (which of course is the authority on everything... It's crowd sourced which means you actually wrote it. So, if you lied when you penned it you actually lied to yourself. It is a little like dehydrated breakfast cereal hour), and there really isn't a definitive origin.  It is like it just sprang up from dust.  I am seriously considering putting forward the blustery idea that it was actually a group of rambunctious aliens that did it.  The kind of space traveling misfits that you would normally get if you put up a roadside diner or thereabouts.  

If you can keep the worms at bay, it would be some good stuff.  Of course none of this actually is a real theory, it is just what I believe.  

Regardless, when it comes to where the term Hoosier came from, I really do want to know.  Try as I might, I cannot find anyone that really knows.  But, I did find this nugget trying to at least define the term. 

 

Wikipedia:

The etymology of hoosier is unclear, but it has been used since at least 1830. According to Bill Bryson, there are many suggestions for the derivation of the word, but none is universally accepted.^{[citation needed]} Jacob Piatt Dunn, longtime secretary of the Indiana Historical Society, noted that "hoosier" was frequently used in many parts of the South in the 19th century for woodsmen or rough hill people.

 So there you have it.  Rough hill people. I kinda like that definition.  Although, I am not really sure if the hill is rough or the people is rough.  Either way, just having the word rough in there is a good thing.  As you can imagine, I am a fan of that word as it ends in a completely unpronounceable "gh".  Just who invented that little piece, I would really like to know as well.  If I figure it out, they are definitely off the Christmas list.

On to the point of this entry.

There is a little known MTB trail network in southern Indiana in Brown County.  Just outside of Nashville Indiana.  (That is right, I said Nashville.)  It is a funky little artsy town in the hill country of Indiana.  Hoosiers live there.

 

Almost fell off my chair on the way down. It was snowing. Again. This is the longest winter of all time.

 

We really felt like we needed to get somewhere that was not Wisconsin or more specifically not freezing and snow covered and ride.  If you live in the northern part of the USA, you know what I am talking about.  It has been a long long winter.  But, fret not.  There are parts of the world that the ground is not frozen still in April.  Trails that you can smell the moisture in the dirt. 

So we loaded up and headed down there in the new Subaru wagon with a pile of bikes on the back.  7 hours later and we were out, free,  no snow and no frozen ground.  When we arrived, we blitzed out to the woods and walked around with little mud and no frost.  Afterward, we headed into town where there is a really good little brewery there called Big Woods.  Check it. They have a really nice burger and an even better IPA. 

 

Loaded. Let's go already.

If you go there, you really need to go to Big Woods Brewery.

 

Their trail network at Brown County is really really well done.  I am not entirely sure how big the park is, but probably 10,000 acres or so.  There is about 30 miles of purpose built singletrack.  Benched in to the hill and really sweet flow. 

We rode with Paul Arlinghaus of the Hoosier Mountain Bike association (He is a hill person, a great rider and great trail builder).  Make sure you say hello if you go down.

 

We're here, we're here!

 

 

Good to see you old friend!

 

 

Lotsa smiles. People that have not seen dirt in a while, are really happy.

 

 

A trail, a bike and a dog.

 

 

She may not look like much, but that is 14 pounds of mountain bike dog right there, quick, light on her feet and a cool scarf to match. She did 2 hours on Saturday and 3 hours on Sunday.

 

 

It was a little bit muddy on Saturday, but the trails hold up well.

 

 

Check it, sunroof open and the windows open.

 

 

Really nice Brown County trail.

 

 

There are some really nice rocky sections as well.

 

That is it for Brown County.  I'll be back.  Probably a few times next winter.  There is a trail and a Hare Trigger IPA there with my name on it.  In addition, I truly believe that Hoosier is not a vacuum cleaner appliance and there is a real definition out there.  Even if there is not a real definition, I have discovered 1st hand that they are really cool.

out,

Joe

Damn, that stone is heavy! Wow, what a classics season!

Damn, that stone is heavy!  Wow, what a classics season!

 

Until you hold one of these, you just do not realize how heavy it is.

 

After a lot of years of trying, we have finally won a few classics.  Not for trying mind you, we have been trying for so long I was beginning to think we were never going to get there.  I have always heard that if you push your head against the wall long enough, you would eventually push through.  But, you could also give yourself quite a headache. 

 

I think of all the images

-       George Hincapie coming so close.

-       George Hincapie in a pile

-       Fabian outsprinted in MSR

-       Fabian ganged up on and combine'd at Roubaix

-       Fabian with a broken collarbone on the street in RVV

As you can see it has been a long effort.  We have been trying to win these races for a long time.

 

In the end, if you stay dedicated and keep working at it you can get there, those are things I have always believed in.  This year, everything finally came together. 

 

Ciolek was a surprise winner at MSR, at the time. When you go back and watch the race, it wasn't really a surprise. He won by being smart.

Fabian won E3 with brute force. He was just not matchable.

This shot shows the effort that Fabian put out on the Patterberg to dislodge Sagan. It was impressive.

Dust and cobbles and a full gas effort. Look at both of their faces, and you can see that this is not easy.

 

 

Time to go to the holy land!

 

Last week after RVV, I headed over to Belgium.  I had always planned to stop in with the team at this time of the year.  For better or worse, we were going to go and push our head against the wall more and see if this was the year.  As the wins ticked by, and I realized that I was actually heading over to celebrate with the team vs. sit and hope, it was with really high hopes that I could be there for one of the actual wins.

 

You see, not only had Trek not been there for a win, I personally also had not been there for a win.  I was pumped. 

 

When you drive into Belgium from Holland at this time of the year, the images of Eddy Merckx and Freddy Maertens dance through your head.  I can hear Axel say to me “Belgium is special.  I don’t know if I want to live there, but in March/April there is no other place to be.”   He is right.  The signs on the road just confirm that you are in the galactic center of cycling.  Ghent, Wevelgem, Oudenarde, Harelbeke, etc… 

 

I arrived in time to see the end of Fabian’s press conference where he was very calm and collected.  “It will be war.”  He looked trim and ready for battle.  Roubaix was on.

 

I have come to know Fabian over the years, and I love his sense of humor and professionalism.  “Let’s get this done” was what he said to me as he left the press conference for a ride.  War. 

 

At this point you have seen the race, and what you should know is that the race is even harder than what you have seen on television.  The bikes are destroyed after the race, wheels are crunched, drivetrains are trashed.  But even worse than that is the toll on the riders.  Roubaix is a special race.  There is nothing else like it.  You do not win Roubaix with team strategy alone.  At best a team strategy just delivers the leader to the last 70k healthy.  After that, it is entirely up to the leaders themselves.  You go to the front and you lay down power that only a few can produce.  You lay that power down for an hour.  I am talking about 400-500 watts, average, after riding for nearly 5 hours. 

 

To win Roubaix requires that you go “full gas” as Luca would say until there just isn’t any gas left.  If you time it right, that last ounce of energy is burned at the finish line.  If you time it wrong, you burn that last bit of energy 50meters before the line and get 2^nd. 

It was pretty much a full on track stand to catch there breath before they sprinted.

The sweet taste of victory. Worlds slowest sprint, as they were both completely spent. The whole place erupted.

He could barely walk after the finish. He had to be helped to the podium. Nothing left at all.

 

Until you ride over these at speed on a road bike, you just cannot realize how bad they are.

And so there you have it.  Our best classics season ever.  We will probably never equal that again.  3 monuments in one year is pretty special. 

Only about 330 days now until classics season again next year.  The absolute best races of the year happen in March and April. 

Out,

Joe

In case you have forgotten: PARIS ROUBAIX IS TOMORROW!!!

I know that you could not have possibly forgotten.  But, if you have here is a reminder or 2.

 

This video does a pretty good job of showing what it feels like for mortals like us to do one section of cobbles.  Ouch.

 

 

This video tells it all.  This blog is on the Trek website, and I certainly wish there were more Trek's in that video, but that does not matter.  This is an epic race, that is exciting no matter what.

Enjoy tomorrow, I know I will.

Out,

Joe

Watch out for Andy!

As I get ready to watch my favorite race of the year (The Tour of Flanders), and I prepare to revel in the later April classics,  I actually have just one thing on my mind.  It is not beer and it is not just the races I am about to watch.  After all, those races are the best days of the year.  Amazing that I go from bitching about the weather at home right into the best days of the year - no in between.  I have always been kinda polar opposites.  But seriously, I really have only one piece of wisdom today.  Watch out for Andy.

I am going to say this just once, and I am going to own it - Andy Schleck is not done. 

 

I love this image of Andy. Alone at the front of the race, decimating the field.

 

Most of the internet experts have decided to write Andy off and look beyond him.  It seems that most people feel that Andy has seen his day. He had his brief time at the front and he has lost his way.  A combination of mismanaged teams, team managers that he did not get on with, his brothers situation etc...  In most peoples mind thats it.  He is done. Heading back to Luxembourg to sit around in coffee shops and say, "remember that day at Liege?  Or that day on the Galibier?  Or that day on the way to Morzine? Or the Giro d'Italia...?"  See that is the problem, most people think that his career came and went on one day on the Galibier. 

I know Andy.  Andy is not done.  Andy is singularly capable of ripping apart the Tour de France.  Andy has the biggest motor of any athlete I have ever met.  He is capable of riding away from everyone else in the biggest race of the year.  There is a fire burning inside Andy. I have seen it in his eyes, felt in his text messages and heard it in his voice. 

Just before writing this, Andy has finished his first stage race in over a year.  He did not do well.  He was pack fodder.  But most people forget that Andy is never great at this time of the year.  But, he is actually way better than at other times at this time of the year.  He has been quietly putting in the work and planning.  The first step in getting back to where he was 2 years ago, when that photo at the top of the blog was current.  On that day, he was absolutely the best rider in the bunch.  Sure he got beaten by Cadel in the final TT, but that day above was pure talent and pure passion on Andy's part. It was an explosive day.  The world felt right and young.  Lots of things that are not great have happened in the sport since then, but when I look at that day on the Galibier, it is pure to me.  

I love the sport, I love the classics in Belgium, I love the big mountain stages in the tour, I love watching Andy ride.  Andy has had a hard go of it the past couple of years.  I just cannot wait to see him show all of us that he still has it. As Jens Voigt says, the TDF is not the same without Andy.

 

Andy did not win the TDF in 2011.  Most people say "He was 2nd, again."  But, if you were there on that 18th stage in 2011, it was beyond epic.  I was in a pub in Paris watching the TT 2 days later and I was crushed for him.  But, Andy and Frank finished on the podium at the end.  It was a great race.  Andy made it a great race.

Andy is not done making races great.

Out.  Going to Flanders.  Trappist Ale and bike racing!

Joe

 

 

This was the funniest interview of all time.  Frank and Andy being interviewed by Ushi.  It appears to have been pulled off Youtube, but I found it on a japanese website.  Enjoy. 

 

 

Turning Belgianese, I think I'm turning Belgianese, I really think so!

Qhubeka wins MSR. How about that? Sagan looks completely shattered over that.

 

This past weekend was La Primivera, Milan-San Remo.  The oldest of the classics, one of the 5 monuments, the only race to live up to its name anymore, the longest single day race on the calendar.  But, it is not in Belgium, so therefore it is only the harbinger of the great races to come.  Still, it marks time and it signals that Belgium is nigh.  

After MSR, the whole crazy circus moves north to Belgium.  From not to LBL in late April is the absolute best races of the entire year. Ghent-Wevelgem, E3, Flanders, Roubaix (not Belgium, but we forgive them), Liege Bastogne Liege.  By far, those are the best races of the year.  Only the hardmen of cycling can expect to do well there.

The Belgian fans are the best, the beer is the best, the whole place is all about cycling. Belgium is the galactic center of cycling, after all.

 

Nectar of the gods!

That is a case of Westvleteren.  A case! (well almost a case, as there is already one missing in the picture).  If that does not mean anything to you, then you should just click out of this whole blog entry as it is all going to just be too Belgian for you.  And don't start saying things like "Joe, aren't you an IPA fan..." or, "What about English beer?..."  All of that is fine stuff, but this post is about all things Belgian.  Get over it.

Belgium things.

1.  It rains like 270 days per year in Belgium.  Those people are hardy.

2.  It is a small country and does not have a government.  People seem to be good with that.

3.  Tommeka.  Not sure how they get that from Tom, but hey.

4.  Beer.  That and IPA are it.

5.  Cyclocross.  In fact, cyclocross on courses that would be hard on a mountain bike. 

6.  Cobbles.  Thank god they didn't decide to pave those over.  Think how hard it must be on car suspension also.

 

7. Chocolate covered waffles.  If you have not had one during a ride, then you do not know yet what you are missing.  Forget the stupid ride bar, this is the best.

8.  Belgians actually go to the beach, on the North Sea.  I bet that is warm.

9.  The people of Flanders actually want to secede, because even a country with no government is too much governance. 

So.  Let the Belgian classics begin!

Joe

 

 

 

 

The World Explained By The Story Of 2 Cows!

 

Those are cows.

 

The world is a strange place. Hard to understand. Why does the sun come up, why does water swirl in the drain, why do they put soap in small bottles, why don't the small rocks and glass on your tires cut your hand when you put your hand against the tire while riding to clear it off, why can't we all just get along, who am I, why isn't there a burrito shop here, why is it that girls do not like IPA (aren't they really missing something?)...? And on and on.

Hard to explain, not pleasant, disturbing.

Saw this really good simple definition of the various political/social systems in the world. At least I do not have this question any longer. If you have questions, you can probably get the poster as well. 

 

This explains the economics of it all. If you want to read it before you order it, some of the pieces are spelled out below.

 

 

The World Explained By The Story Of 2 Cows!

 

SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows.

You give one to your neighbour.

 

COMMUNISM

You have 2 cows

The State takes both and gives you some milk.

 

FASCISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and sells you some milk.

 

BUREAUCRATISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.

 

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell one and buy a bull.

Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.

You sell them and retire on the income.

 

VENTURE CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.

The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.

The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.

 

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.

Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has died.

 

A FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.(Cyclists do not need that road anyway.)

 

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.

You decide to have lunch. (I love this one.)

 

A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you.

You charge the owners for storing them.

 

A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You have 300 people milking them.

You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.

You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

 

AN INDIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You worship them.

 

A BRITISH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Both are mad.

 

AN IRAQI CORPORATION

Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.

You tell them that you have none.

Nobody believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country.

You still have no cows but at least you are now a Democracy.

 

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Business seems pretty good.

You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

 

A GREEK CORPORATION

You have two cows bought with money borrowed from French and German banks.

You eat both of them.

The banks call to collect their milk, but you cannot deliver so you call the IMF.

The IMF loans you two cows.

You eat both of them.

The banks and the IMF call to collect their cows/milk.

You are out getting a haircut.

 

A GERMAN CORPORATION

You have to cows.

You mechanize the milk production of the cows.

You insist with your nose in the air that your milk production is way better than others.  You regulate everything about the cows and then say "but of course, that is because German cows are superior."

 

 

That is the world's largest ball of twine. I just like the random nature of it. I am also amazed that it tood Francis 29 years to construct. Damn, he had some time on his hands.

 

Sometimes you have to be pushed!

Sometimes you have to be pushed, sometimes you do not!

This is the tale of 2 rides.  Both of the rides were really fun.  Both of the rides happened in the past week.  Both of the rides were on Domane's.  Both of the rides were approximately 3 or more hours.  Both of the rides were with a group of riders all with the same motivation.  On both rides I was wearing Bontrager Pro Cycling team kit.  Both of the rides were on loops that are not my normal ride loops.  Probably the similarities could go on and and on.  Probably you are already tired of this blog post.  If you want, you can just scan down and look at the different pictures.  They are nice in a squishy kinda way.

But, the 2 rides could not have been more different. 

The first ride was a group ride with the Bontrager Pro Cycling team in Solvang California.  The Bontrager Pro Cycling team training camp just finished up last week in Solvang.  Axel Merckx rang me up before hand and said "Joe, you need to get out of that weather in Wisconsin and come out and meet the guys and get out for a ride with us."  Boom.  That was all the prompting I needed to blow out of the super posh digs at the Trek office and snake out to California.  (Look over there, is that the sun peaking out through the clouds?)  I do not think anyone knew where I was that week - hiding from real work you know. 

 

That is a beautiful site, eh?

 

This was not an easy gig to get.  I had to spend the whole day in the office, fly out to California after work, drive up to Solvang, get there late, get up early, eat breakfast with the gang, go on a ride, dinner, rinse and repeat, then bust back to the airport, fly home and go to the office.  Hey, someone had to do it!

 

That is Trek Race Shop employee Mark Andrews fitting up one of the guys on his Speed Concept. Axel's Axes clearly on display.

 

 

That is the man himself, Axel Merckx showing the kids how it is done. Notice that it is warm enough for no gloves. Big deal for someone who lives in Wisconsin.

 

 

Get your Honey Stinger stuff right here. Many thanks to the Honey Stinger guys for supporting the Bontrager kids.

 

I really didn't have to be convinced to go out there.  After all, if you have been following along here, you know that I am about to loose it because of the winter that will not end here in Wisconsin.  As I look out on my backyard now (March 3) it is completely covered in snow and Weather.com says there is a big storm coming tomorrow night.  Ugh.  Surely this has to end at some point. 

If you are trying to figure out what bike to get for yourself and happen to be killing time ready this dribble that I put up, I can tell you that the paint scheme from the Bontrager Pro Cycling team is about the best looking Domane in the world.  Look around on Project One and you can build up the same bike. 

 

There is your new Domane! SWEET! (That is a Madone, but it looks alot like that)

 

 Sometimes you do have to be pushed.

I am starting this section out admitting I am a wimp.  I have not always been a wimp, I have become a wimp over time.  I used to be much tougher.  I am still pretty tough at times, but when it comes to cold weather - I am about as wimpy as they come. Like I said, wimp.

It is pretty hard to be a cyclist and live in Wisconsin in the winter.  Wisconsin is a great place to be a cyclist in the summer.  Lots of roads, more and more mountain bike trails being built, cities with lots of bike lanes and bike trails, lots of organized rides, the biggest participant mountain bike series in the country (WORS), access to great neighbor ride centers like Copper Harbor etc... 

But, winter it all kinda shuts down.  Snow covers the state and we have many a day with the high temperature well below freezing.  Wisconsin is not such a great place to be into cycling in the winter.

"We are going for a ride on Sunday, at 10:30", Chad called and filled me in. 

"I hate cold, why would you go for a ride at 10:30 when it is going to be friggin cold.  I hate cold.", that is my standard response about winter these days.

"Don't be a baby.  You are going for a ride with us on Sunday." I think that is Chad's basic response when talking to me in the winter.

"Only if it is above 25 degrees." Clearly a condition that probably could not be met.

"Your going for a ride with us on Sunday.  That is the last of it." Chad trying to put his foot down and not have anymore of my whimpering.

Errr....  I hate cold.  I really hate cold.  I just knew it was going to be cold, and I hoped that I could figure out a way to have a bad hangnail or something that would keep me from going out.  When I work up on Sunday, it was a balmy 1 degree Fahrenheit.  1 degree.  What the hell?  It is March for crying out loud.  1 degree.  I immediately sent a text to Chad.

"It is 1 degree.  WTH?  Isn't it March?" Me acting super surprised at the temperature.

"See you at Barriques at 11:30.  Don't be late, it is too cold to stand outside."  (No kidding) Chad.  Enough of this.

 

I sent Chad this when I left my driveway to go to Barriques for the ride. 16degrees. I thought for sure he would see how futile it was to go outside.

 

"You better get some gas on the way home, it is not safe to drive around with just half a tank of gas". Chad. 

Ok, I get the point.  Don't be such a wuss. Shut up and get to Barriques. 

"If it is below 25degrees, I am going to whine!" Me.

(no response from Chad on that one.)  I sent it again, still no response...

It was cold, and not just an average cold.  It was colder than...  I ended up putting on a ton of clothes and surviving it.  I do not think I even whined.  I probably couldn't because I could not move my mouth, it was so cold.

Poor Simon, he moves here from Australia - during our winter, their summer - and goes straight onto a road bike ride at 20degrees.  "I have every piece of clothes I own on." 

 

It was cold, and we rode at an angle. Look at the sky though.

 

 

On a cold day during a bike ride, you will pretty much eat anything. Check out the Bontrager Pro Cycling team gear. Eh?

 

I guess that is it.  Winter is over.  (Supposed to snow 12 inches tomorrow.)  We will be riding outside from now on, I guess. 

 

Soon it should be like this even here in Wisconsin. If you have not checked out the Bontrager Cycling Team website, click the photo and check it out.

 

Pray for snow.  I need to shed this reputation of being a wimp.

Cheers.  Out.

Joe

There are at least 7.6 things I love about cycling.

A sad sad state of affairs has presented itself to me this month. 

 

Sign going down to my basement. Makes me feel that maybe another burrito would solve things.

 

What do you suppose is going on down in the basement?  I have been down there (don't tell anyone), I personally do not understand the hype. 

That sign is a little bit how I feel about my current personal dilemma.  Do you want to guess how many burrito's I have had this year?  The burrito count is frankly pathetic.  Yes, I know that is almost unheard of.  Actually I wrote another entry last week of discovering some great old music while eating a burrito.  Just goes to show you that great things happen to those that eat burrito's.  Makes me think of that saying that is attributed to Albert Einstien about thinking and riding a bicycle.  It is probably true, but can equally be applied to eating burritos.  But, if you could combine the 2 then it would be the perfect day.  In fact, the Fox add said it best (In a perfect world, your favorite trail would end at a taco stand). 

But, I was at home for most of the first week of January, and the burrito did not make an appearance.  We had plenty of mexican food, but technically the burrito did not make the grade.  Absurd I know, but it just did not happen. 

Then we went to Utah and skied our brains out.  In Utah, the burrito is not a high altitude thing.  Then I went to spain, and the burrito does not exist there.  Then when I returned all jetylagged, and the burrito had just not woken up yet.  On top of that, I am married to a no gluten no sugar no dairy mostly veggie girl.  Good for the health, but bad for the burrito count.  We also had burrito intention interruptitis (Hanna kinda messed up the inside of her car one night, so that was a distraction - for example - yuck.)

It is mid february, and there have been a few burrito's.  But, the count is way down.  You remember last year, that there was a plethora of burritos.  I think 28.  I need to get moving.  The burrito will be conquered.  All of this healthy eating thing was not supposed to be at the expense of the burrito.  After all, I am wearing Converse shoes today.  Are we not Devo?

Surrender Dorothy!

 

On to the actual point of this all.  Bikes.  Bikes are cool.  After all, they have just 2 wheels. 

1.  It is not a ride until there is blood.  Can you imagine saying this about bowling?  It is not a game until there are smashed fingers and tendenitis in your wrist. - nah.

2.  They have 2 wheels.  1 wheel would be stupid, and 4 wheels is called a car.  Cars kinda suck, that is for sure one thing that Schwinn had right.

3.  The Burrito is the perfect post ride food.  See about 19 previous blog entries to prove this one.  By the way, the cafe at work put mozzarella cheese inside a burrito today at lunch.  I almost burned the place down.  That would be like putting a ride computer on your Slash (oh wait.)

4.  IPA.  In case you are wondering what I mean by this, it is beer.  If you had to ask, then you should just move on to the next point.  IPA is a biker kinda thing.  We are happy to drink Old Milwaukee, but given a choice IPA is what moves you.  Don't even get me started talking about Belgium and beer - that is coming.

5.  Right hand front brake.  Point of this, is that mountain bikers do this.  Exactly 5.6 road riders do this, but an uncountable number of mountain bikers do this and that makes it groovy.

6. No speed limits.  If you exceed the speed limit in a car, you will get a ticket.  We already established car suck (actually Schwinn did that a long time ago), so lets move on.  But, if you exceed the speed limit on a motorcycle, you will still get a speeding ticket.  They only have 2 wheels, but that makes them not as cool as bikes.  On a bike, you can pretty much go as fast as you want.  It is about the only vehicle that is really fun, and you can completely disregard speed limits.  So there.

7. Roads, where we are going we do not need any stinking roads. 

 

8.  They have the potential to violate the space time continuum. As you know, the future comes around every so often.  It shows itself, and then it moves on.  That makes me nervous every time.  I do not want to wake up one day with too many thumbs.

9.  Belgium.  Did I mention Belgium?  It is only the actual epicenter of cycling.

10.  That new bike smell.  You know, crisp shifting, smooth whir of the road.

11.  That old ratty bike that still gets you there. 

12.  Getting beat by a girl. Happens to me more often than I like to admit.  The bicycle is the great leveler.  Big people do not necessarily have an advantage any more than gender gives you an advantage.  Although gender does make you look better in lycra.

14.  Those racks that hold your bike on the back of your car.  Congratulations Mr.rack on the back of your car inventor guy, your a genius.

15.  The Tour de France.  It is not really a bike race, more of a freak show.  I know that a lot of you are really taken aback that I would say that.  But, a bike race is Flanders or Roubaix or Liege Bastogne Liege, or an enduro MTB race or just about any cyclocross race.  In those races, with 5k to go there can still be 10 people that can win.  When you get to the bottom of the Mur, there might still be a group of 20 together.  It is unbelievable how exciting that can be.  In the TDF, by day 10 there are like 3 guys that could win. So then we look at the French countryside on TV and listen to Paul and Phil drone on and on about how someone is a beautiful bike rider (accent required).   But, I still love going to the tour, it is the most beautiful freak show in the world.

16.  Cyclocross.  Holy crap.  What a freak show that is.  In fact, it is the most exciting cowbell ringing, bacon throwing freak show there is.

17.  JHK's remedy.  Check it out.  Just makes me drool.

 

JHK's Remedy. Wow is all I can say.

The list goes on and on.  Not sure if it would ever stop if I really didn't let it stop.  I have been a cyclist my whole life (and I am old.  Geez, old dude get some new music after all.  Don't even get me started on trying to get Pearl Jam tickets.), I don't really know much else.  I do know a little about bikes though, and boy oh boy will I let you know that.

Why are you still reading this?  Go ride your bike.  Belgium is coming.

I wish I had some new converse.  All of my existing pairs are getting worn, and the laces on the left shoe are all to long.  (That is always the case).

It is only 38 days until the greatest bike race of the year.  Get my Jupiler!

Out,

Joe

Brad nor Random neither are not Pearl Jam

 

Stop Making Sense. Remember the big suit?

Recently I rediscovered some old music that is really really good. I was at a chipotle trying to get caught up on my burrito consumption. As you know, I am way way behind. There have been months where I have been able to stay entirely clear of the number of days that have flipped over with straight up count of burrito like objects that I have consumed. After all, it is essential to good health to consume burritos. But, of late I have had for some reason a tough time with that count.

 

Digging in with my head down on the burrito count I found myself tapping out a good rhythm with a song I recognized as an old Talking Heads song. I imediately Shazamed it and yep - Crosseyed and Painless from Stop Making Sense. Wow. What a great album. Remember the big suit? For 3 days now, I cannot stop listening to TH.

I know that this will absolutely surprise you to learn that there is actually a band other than Pearl Jam. I have been known to deny that as well. After all it is the only station still in business on Serius Radio.

Which brings me to my current debate. Brad is not Pearl Jam. I know it contains a Pearl Jam member, and Stone Gossard is possibly the coolest member of Pearl Jam, but it is not Pearl Jam. Pearl Jam requires Eddy on vocals, Mike on guitar as well, Jeff on bass and Matt on drums. They do a nice cover of the Neil Young song Don't Cry (actually better than Neil does), but that still isn't really Pearl Jam.

I got really excited about Brad. It is reasonably good music and works well on the trainer. I bought it all.  Gave it all a really good listen.  Afterall, there hasn't been any new PJ in a while. But I still want more PJ.

 

Which brings up my current rant. I spent an hour last Saturday in the virtual waiting room on the ticket site trying to get summer tickets to see PJ at Wrigley, only to be denied. I had 3 devices logged in trying my absolute best to get tickets. I am convinced I was robbed.

 

Don't ask me what Random is all about. I think that just shows that Jeff is bored and there needs to be a new PJ project.

Joe

 

Get this. Give it a listen.

 

 

Watch this if you have nothing else to do for an hour and half.  The big suit comes in at 1'05".  Good luck.

 

 

  

Magical Mystery Tour

John Lennon watching me eat a burrito at the Red Iguana in SLC!

When the pages turn, they turn. Kinda like that song, you know the one that goes. Ba b aba bap. Ba b aba bap. Boop! I am pretty sure it is a Saphires song, or maybe Pearl Jam. Andy says it is a little like on the grapevine. I am pretty sure there is no bus though, at least not one with a fancy paint scheme. If your looking for something not on the menu, then head on out of here. I am not a short order cook any more than I am Yoda.

Our adventure begins about 2 weeks ago. The night was – moist. And that moisture is what lead to this tale. A tale of airplane rides, ski slopes packing loads of new snow, bike rides on roads that can only be imagined and skinny bike racers with fancy new kits. Listen closely. The tour started out with an airplane ride to the promised land, a trip to the beehive state with gravity on my mind. It had been a long time since we had been to Utah and a long time since we had toyed with the gravity setting on our space suits that much.

I think this is the best IPA i have ever had. Art introduced me to it. OMG!

Here is a snapshot,we went to Utah, we saw our good friend Art, we skied 5 spectacular days at Snowbird and Alta, I reignited my love affair with Utah and specifically Alta. It was cool. But, of course that does not tell the whole story, as we had 3 days of snow pounding down on us. Not huge huge amounts, but about 12 inches per day for those 3 days. At times it was hard to see what we were doing, at others it was hard to see period, and at others still the snow was so thick that is was a bit like swimming.

 

But oh my, gravity is good. I had forgotten just how good Alta is. It can be steep, it can be deep and there are not many people there the 2nd week of January. It is totally worth it.

Check out all that gravity!

From there, I flew directly to Mallorca.

You are probably wondering if planes can actually fly directly from the land of white fluffy to the Mediteranean. I can tell you this, they do. I went to attend a super double dog secret meeting of the future. Great fun it was and no babel fish were harmed in any of it. The meeting was all about our over all plans for the Trek European business and we were visited by the future there. Once again, I will have to leave you hanging as that particular version of the future was all shinny and bright and cannot be mentioned (much like the season who cannot be named). You just cannot know, or again – you know the thumb thing.

But, while we were there we rode our bikes and sampled some of the great roads on the Island. It is a sort of mecca for winter cycling for Europe. While there you will regularly see pros from all the big teams and continental teams and shop teams all spending time on the island riding the quiet roads along the coasts and into the mountains. Good stuff. I would plan to go back for sure. If you go, be sure to stay at Reeds Hotel – they will treat you right. Tell them Joe sent you, or … maybe you shouldn’t do that. Either way, it will be good for you. I will tell you this though, Porridge and Oatmeal are not the same thing – even if a Spanish or English person tells you they are. Not.

If you are wondering, you cook the oats first – then add berries, then almonds, then yogurt. It is called Joe-tmeal.

I don't know what is going on in the background.

It is pretty nice in Mallorca.

Nice looking road.

I have no real idea what is going on here either.

From there, I joined up with the skinny bike racers and saw them doing some great training and working on position on the TT bike and doing that “we are going to go fast this year thing with their eyebrows”. It was in Valencia.  Lots of skinny bike racer types that can go way faster than me.  I think they are going to have a really good year.

Time to go for a group ride. Oh, let's say 6-7 hours...

Hmm....

Frank Schleck has a pretty nice looking bike on that new Madone.

I always like a big stack of pro bikes.

I cannot wait for Belgium and France and Italy and all those other Yoda like lands with the epic bike races that will be on. Oh, and then there is Belgian beer and frites you must not forget.

 

Enjoy the pictures. Adios.